Yep…so I never really intended for Sundays to be Hikikomori days, where I just stay in my room and study, but it just so happened to turn out that way. And just as always, I never get anything tangible done. I get the thinking part down; I got the taking notes part over with…but to actually do an assignment, it’s almost mind-numbingly pointless.
I do the readings for class, and because I never usually have anything to contribute during discussions, I just sit and listen to the professor lecture. Granted, this is what I do at SUA, but could a class be anymore tiring than it already is? This week, I’ve realized just how draining it is to commute to class. I’ve always said it was a long walk to the subte and then a long walk from the subte, just to get to the university, but physically, it hit me hard.
I’ve been passing out on my bed the moment I get back home. It’s a nice break, an hour or so, and it gears me up for a night of studying. But, at the same time, it throws of my sleep schedule. A sleep later, then have to wake up early again. Although, it’s become routine for the past…9 years of my life [oh shit I feel old], it’s time to get back into rhythm with what my subconscious is telling me.
Anyway, motivation. It’s a hard thing to find, especially when you know there are better things to do. It’ll come around soon, I hope.
“Me gusta estar a un lado del camino // Fumando el humo mientras todo pasa // Me gusta abrir los ojos y estar vivo”
“I like to be on the side of the sidewalk, smoking away while everything passes by // I like to open my eyes and be alive” – “Al Lado del Camino” by Fito Paez
End – Week 7: Brave New World
Day 48: Rain, Rain, Thanks Today, Don’t Come Back Another Day
Filming was canceled today. Due to rain.
Normally, I would be slightly disappointed, if not pissed, to have missed a day of filming, but because I could miss it today, I was able to go see sensei’s video. Yaay.
Erika and I went to the Asian market, to look for food. I totally wanted to buy everything there, but obviously couldn’t because I was gonna go to the kaikan afterwards… and it would’ve sucked to carry everything over there. XD So yes. We were walking in the rain and having fun getting wet by the overhangs.
We went to Erika’s district leader’s house, because she had said she would take us. We took a taxi over the kaikan. Entering through the gates is like entering into a familiar world. I totally felt like I left Argentina for a few hours. The video was pretty interesting. I remember comprehending a lot of it during the actual viewing, but I think I still need to work on retaining that comprehension. X_x
After I got back to my end of Buenos Aires, I had a pretty chill evening with a few people. While we were waiting for a table to get dinner at Humana, we met up with other people from our program. We were talking, waiting for our table…slightly cold [freezing]. So originally, we were supposed to eat around 9:30ish. We actually got in like an hour and 15 minutes later.
But it was worth it.
They had good food. Man, so much was put out on the table, both literally and metaphorically. I learned a lot about people that whom I knew, but didn’t really know. It was fun.
But, damn rain. Too cold for ice cream for me.
Normally, I would be slightly disappointed, if not pissed, to have missed a day of filming, but because I could miss it today, I was able to go see sensei’s video. Yaay.
Erika and I went to the Asian market, to look for food. I totally wanted to buy everything there, but obviously couldn’t because I was gonna go to the kaikan afterwards… and it would’ve sucked to carry everything over there. XD So yes. We were walking in the rain and having fun getting wet by the overhangs.
We went to Erika’s district leader’s house, because she had said she would take us. We took a taxi over the kaikan. Entering through the gates is like entering into a familiar world. I totally felt like I left Argentina for a few hours. The video was pretty interesting. I remember comprehending a lot of it during the actual viewing, but I think I still need to work on retaining that comprehension. X_x
After I got back to my end of Buenos Aires, I had a pretty chill evening with a few people. While we were waiting for a table to get dinner at Humana, we met up with other people from our program. We were talking, waiting for our table…slightly cold [freezing]. So originally, we were supposed to eat around 9:30ish. We actually got in like an hour and 15 minutes later.
But it was worth it.
They had good food. Man, so much was put out on the table, both literally and metaphorically. I learned a lot about people that whom I knew, but didn’t really know. It was fun.
But, damn rain. Too cold for ice cream for me.
Day 47: Extra Step Necessary to Move On
Up until this point, I’ve come a long way. It’s not even halfway there yet, but I’ve had many difficulties, victories, and stories to tell about both. But, I think this week alone, I’ve had this sense of stability and assurance that I’m okay now. This week was about getting back into my old skin with a new mental self. Just as SUA’s hustle-and-bustle restarted for another year this week, I was hustling and bustling on a different path for myself.
I think I’ve finally let go of SUA. Not the memories that I have of SUA, but my dependency and my constant comparison between SUA and Buenos Aires. They are incomparable, two distinct and separate entities. Comparing two things between each other does nothing, especially in such an inevitable position such as study abroad.
Therefore, I took another step, beyond the hustle and bustle that SUA had me doing for the past two year that helped me grow to become more compassionate, more open, more positive. A step from the exterior self that I’ve created, and into my innermost being.
So, I got my eyebrow pierced today.
0wned.
I went to the piercing parlor with Erika and a few of her friends [I met Kamron look-alike!] who were also getting something pierced. I was really nervous actually. I made my decision last-minute after Erika came out of the room with her ears pierced. !!! The lady was speaking to me in English. I was kind relieved, because I was so nervous, I don’t think Spanish would’ve gotten through to me [or maybe I was speaking in Spanish and I just don’t remember…].
But yea. It stung a little, but it was quick and easy. I was in and out. 30 pesos.
We had to go the pharmacy to pick up the solution and soap, so we stopped by there. It was funny because the four of us all bought the same things. Pretty funny.
When I got back home, I passed out. I don’t know why I was so tired, but when I woke up, I had forgotten I got my eyebrow pierced and it scared the shit outta me. Hahah.
Later tonight, I went to my friend’s house to watch two [actually 1 and a quarter] movies for class. This was the friend who had the slightly “racist” host mom. She was really nice and not at all as my friend described. She later told me that she was in one of her better moods today. Whew. Regardless, I was mentally ready, just in case anything happened.
But, afterwards when we stopped the second movie [because the quality was just too bad], we were just talking about life and music here in Buenos Aires. For the first time, since I’ve been here, I really thought that I didn’t want to leave Buenos Aires. That 5 months is slightly too short.
My subconscious is telling me to enjoy it while I can, to take that extra step.
I think I’ve finally let go of SUA. Not the memories that I have of SUA, but my dependency and my constant comparison between SUA and Buenos Aires. They are incomparable, two distinct and separate entities. Comparing two things between each other does nothing, especially in such an inevitable position such as study abroad.
Therefore, I took another step, beyond the hustle and bustle that SUA had me doing for the past two year that helped me grow to become more compassionate, more open, more positive. A step from the exterior self that I’ve created, and into my innermost being.
So, I got my eyebrow pierced today.
0wned.
I went to the piercing parlor with Erika and a few of her friends [I met Kamron look-alike!] who were also getting something pierced. I was really nervous actually. I made my decision last-minute after Erika came out of the room with her ears pierced. !!! The lady was speaking to me in English. I was kind relieved, because I was so nervous, I don’t think Spanish would’ve gotten through to me [or maybe I was speaking in Spanish and I just don’t remember…].
But yea. It stung a little, but it was quick and easy. I was in and out. 30 pesos.
We had to go the pharmacy to pick up the solution and soap, so we stopped by there. It was funny because the four of us all bought the same things. Pretty funny.
When I got back home, I passed out. I don’t know why I was so tired, but when I woke up, I had forgotten I got my eyebrow pierced and it scared the shit outta me. Hahah.
Later tonight, I went to my friend’s house to watch two [actually 1 and a quarter] movies for class. This was the friend who had the slightly “racist” host mom. She was really nice and not at all as my friend described. She later told me that she was in one of her better moods today. Whew. Regardless, I was mentally ready, just in case anything happened.
But, afterwards when we stopped the second movie [because the quality was just too bad], we were just talking about life and music here in Buenos Aires. For the first time, since I’ve been here, I really thought that I didn’t want to leave Buenos Aires. That 5 months is slightly too short.
My subconscious is telling me to enjoy it while I can, to take that extra step.
Day 46: Devoid of Any Opinion. So, This is What It’s Like to Be a Robot.
Having 3 classes in one day is…tiring. I don’t know how people do it. Of course, one class is 3 hours long…and the other one starts 8am so I have to get up at 6 to catch the train at 7… Mm, I guess it wouldn’t be so bad to have 3 classes at Soka, but here…it’s just so draining. Because I sit there. And listen.
But the classes are interesting. Just…the times suck.
I’ve never realized how philosophical cinema could be. But, when I think about it, how could I not realize that film was so philosophical, especially since it’s one of the age’s most innovative art form. It’s very interesting, and it makes me even happier that I’ve stuck with the Humanities concentration.
Perfect for my Capstone.
Aside from that, I’m learning things that I’ve already known in the practical aspect of my studies here. In a sense, it’s good to learn it in a classroom setting, just because it’s good to confirm and keep-in-check the things I know. On the other hand, it’s rather boring. But, I’m sure I’ll get something out of it.
Actually, this Saturday, I get to work with a camera with my group. It’s funny how the grouping worked out. This is one of the classes that’s required for the film track only, so it’s only COPA film track students. That’s eight of us. The professor just divided us in half with the alpha-order list. So, all the people who’ve never made a film got grouped into one, and all the people who have made a film got grouped in the other. Curious, isn’t it? XD
Filming will be interesting.
P.S. I think this is the shortest entry I’ve written thus far. I guess that’s what it means to be a robot.
But the classes are interesting. Just…the times suck.
I’ve never realized how philosophical cinema could be. But, when I think about it, how could I not realize that film was so philosophical, especially since it’s one of the age’s most innovative art form. It’s very interesting, and it makes me even happier that I’ve stuck with the Humanities concentration.
Perfect for my Capstone.
Aside from that, I’m learning things that I’ve already known in the practical aspect of my studies here. In a sense, it’s good to learn it in a classroom setting, just because it’s good to confirm and keep-in-check the things I know. On the other hand, it’s rather boring. But, I’m sure I’ll get something out of it.
Actually, this Saturday, I get to work with a camera with my group. It’s funny how the grouping worked out. This is one of the classes that’s required for the film track only, so it’s only COPA film track students. That’s eight of us. The professor just divided us in half with the alpha-order list. So, all the people who’ve never made a film got grouped into one, and all the people who have made a film got grouped in the other. Curious, isn’t it? XD
Filming will be interesting.
P.S. I think this is the shortest entry I’ve written thus far. I guess that’s what it means to be a robot.
Day 45: Where Did the Month Go?
Hm… I have to write a mini capstone for my Aesthetics and Theory of Show Biz class… I only call this a mini capstone because my professor and everyone else in the class call it a thesis. So… wow.
It’s September… and Spring is here…
I’m busy like whoa. I don’t know what hit me. It’s like a sudden tsunami of readings, movies and assignments completely drowning me and taking me deep into the depths of academic suicide. Luckily for me, I’ve bought myself a month’s worth of rice crackers from the oriental mart. I’m set for late nights [like tonight].
This is my break actually…
Today after all of my classes, a few friends and I went to watch a movie for class. It was fun walking around the city with them and getting to know each other more outside of the classroom setting. Definitely enjoyable to have coffee and discuss movies with them. Btw, McDonald’s food here is much better than in the states. Hands down.
I’m actually, really tired…but I feel this will be my first all-nighter here. To prevent this from ever happening again, I’m going to start my homework on weekends, as I had proposed to myself before classes even started.
I checked my email today, and it was amazingly full of mass emails from SUA. It made me sad. But, it has great meaning.
My life here is picking up, just as everyone else’s at SUA. Yay. We’re on track.
Okay, back to work…
P.S, here are some pics of the fotocopiadora. XD The land of cheap photocopies.
It’s September… and Spring is here…
I’m busy like whoa. I don’t know what hit me. It’s like a sudden tsunami of readings, movies and assignments completely drowning me and taking me deep into the depths of academic suicide. Luckily for me, I’ve bought myself a month’s worth of rice crackers from the oriental mart. I’m set for late nights [like tonight].
This is my break actually…
Today after all of my classes, a few friends and I went to watch a movie for class. It was fun walking around the city with them and getting to know each other more outside of the classroom setting. Definitely enjoyable to have coffee and discuss movies with them. Btw, McDonald’s food here is much better than in the states. Hands down.
I’m actually, really tired…but I feel this will be my first all-nighter here. To prevent this from ever happening again, I’m going to start my homework on weekends, as I had proposed to myself before classes even started.
I checked my email today, and it was amazingly full of mass emails from SUA. It made me sad. But, it has great meaning.
My life here is picking up, just as everyone else’s at SUA. Yay. We’re on track.
Okay, back to work…
P.S, here are some pics of the fotocopiadora. XD The land of cheap photocopies.
Day 43: Like an SOS Signal That’s Finally Gotten Some Attention
When I walked out this morning from the building, I felt like I was stepping out into Buenos Aires for the first time. The world seemed like a different place, but at the same time, there was something nostalgic about it. The air was the same, but the way it lingered was different; the buildings were all the same, but the way they glowed under the sun was different. Everything was a whole new uplifting experience. It was almost too unreal to be happening…
Something was waiting for me…
I had left in the first place in order to get some major housekeeping done for my program. Today was the deadline to turn in all final registration forms so that we can get our transcripts at the end of the semester. So, I had to go to FUC first to see if I can figure out the other professors’ names that I wasn’t able to get. Turns out, they didn’t know who taught what at the office, and I didn’t want to bother waiting at the student center to find out. So, I left and went to the copiadora to print out the form and find some materials for class.
Luckily, I was able to find a syllabus for the one class that was absolutely confusing me [where people were writing theses for evaluation and stuff]. So, I’m on par with that class now. Kinda…
I printed out the paper and went to look for my program office, which I hadn’t been to before. It was an adventure… big streets and all. Luckily, I ran into someone else from my program and so we found the place. It was like a regular office building…and really high-class ish and secure. So, I got all that done, turning in my form.
I was really tired by then, but I had class. So I got back to FUC and I was soooo happy to see that two other people from my program were in the same class. This is the one class that was supposed to be on Wednesdays, but the one commission I was in changed to its original schedule [to Mondays], so the other people were torn whether to take the Friday one or this one, so luckily, I had comrades.
This class was actually interesting. I’m really beginning to think that philosophy is easier to understand in Spanish, and it’s more interesting too. Or rather, maybe it’s because it’s about art and aesthetics. Soka should have more classes like that, concentrating on the arts. It’s important, you know. If filmmaking falls through, maybe I’ll get a degree in teaching art & philosophy at SUA. Hahaha. ONLY KIDDING.
Afterwards, I needed to find 2 movies that I needed to watch by tomorrow. La Ciénaga and La Niña Santa. It was REALLY stupid of me to leave this to the day before. When I went to Liberarte, supposedly one of the best video rental places in Buenos Aires, all the copies were rented out… I was shit outta luck. So, I tried looking online to find some bootleg copy. Angela helped me find a site that had a download for La Ciénaga pero half the links were expired, so I couldn’t get them.
I’m hoping I could suffice with just reading the detailed synopses of these, and learn from this experience…to never wait till the last moment.
Arg, today was a busy and tiring day. Too much to do, still stressing out, but still striving forward, I really thought my days would drag along like this for the rest of my study abroad. I didn’t know how I could even travel with an academic load like this. But, then I remembered, I have unlimited potential that I just need to unlock within me.
So, it’s been, give or take, a month since I’ve last gotten in touch with SGI here about trying to find a district that I can go to meetings for. Today, was the day I got the call. However, I can’t go because I have class. But, I was able to make a connection.
Literally…
Like an SOS signal that’s finally gotten some attention.
Something was waiting for me…
I had left in the first place in order to get some major housekeeping done for my program. Today was the deadline to turn in all final registration forms so that we can get our transcripts at the end of the semester. So, I had to go to FUC first to see if I can figure out the other professors’ names that I wasn’t able to get. Turns out, they didn’t know who taught what at the office, and I didn’t want to bother waiting at the student center to find out. So, I left and went to the copiadora to print out the form and find some materials for class.
Luckily, I was able to find a syllabus for the one class that was absolutely confusing me [where people were writing theses for evaluation and stuff]. So, I’m on par with that class now. Kinda…
I printed out the paper and went to look for my program office, which I hadn’t been to before. It was an adventure… big streets and all. Luckily, I ran into someone else from my program and so we found the place. It was like a regular office building…and really high-class ish and secure. So, I got all that done, turning in my form.
I was really tired by then, but I had class. So I got back to FUC and I was soooo happy to see that two other people from my program were in the same class. This is the one class that was supposed to be on Wednesdays, but the one commission I was in changed to its original schedule [to Mondays], so the other people were torn whether to take the Friday one or this one, so luckily, I had comrades.
This class was actually interesting. I’m really beginning to think that philosophy is easier to understand in Spanish, and it’s more interesting too. Or rather, maybe it’s because it’s about art and aesthetics. Soka should have more classes like that, concentrating on the arts. It’s important, you know. If filmmaking falls through, maybe I’ll get a degree in teaching art & philosophy at SUA. Hahaha. ONLY KIDDING.
Afterwards, I needed to find 2 movies that I needed to watch by tomorrow. La Ciénaga and La Niña Santa. It was REALLY stupid of me to leave this to the day before. When I went to Liberarte, supposedly one of the best video rental places in Buenos Aires, all the copies were rented out… I was shit outta luck. So, I tried looking online to find some bootleg copy. Angela helped me find a site that had a download for La Ciénaga pero half the links were expired, so I couldn’t get them.
I’m hoping I could suffice with just reading the detailed synopses of these, and learn from this experience…to never wait till the last moment.
Arg, today was a busy and tiring day. Too much to do, still stressing out, but still striving forward, I really thought my days would drag along like this for the rest of my study abroad. I didn’t know how I could even travel with an academic load like this. But, then I remembered, I have unlimited potential that I just need to unlock within me.
So, it’s been, give or take, a month since I’ve last gotten in touch with SGI here about trying to find a district that I can go to meetings for. Today, was the day I got the call. However, I can’t go because I have class. But, I was able to make a connection.
Literally…
Like an SOS signal that’s finally gotten some attention.
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